Rejection packs a blow that grows decisively more wretched as it sinks in. If you've ever watched The Bachelor (this is my admission, yes), rejected contestants go down a predictable downward trajectory (captured ever so deftly on camera) - first shock, then grief, and then the self-pity ("why does this always happen to me?"). Perhaps it's a case of schadenfreude, or delighting in someone else's misery, but there's something in those moments that intrigues me. I think because they are moments which are all too familiar. Rejection stinks, and with it, a resulting pain that is deeply unsettling.  The Book of Isaiah tells us that Christ was "despised and rejected by men" (53:3).  We know this to be true as we read the Gospel accounts of how Jesus was rejected by many, leading to His crucifixion. I have to think that Jesus felt the pain of rejection somehow. Yet we also see that He persisted in his mission and message. He knew the will of the Father (Luke 17:25). And it is through Christ enduring rejection that we are made forever accepted to God - with His wounds we are healed. 

Rejection will still hurt, but Christ turned it around so that we may never face permanent rejection of the Father. This is the good news of the gospel. 

Happy Resurrection Sunday!

Being courageous is largely subjective - meaning what takes courage for some is old hat to another. For someone as fearful as I, courage is always in tall order. There's a want to shrink back and avoid something all together than risk failure, and ultimately, rejection. Needless to say, there are things I need to work out. But there are moments when I feel a rush of adrenaline and have new found courage to face the things that once were fearful. I remember thinking that I could never ride a bike with proficiency in China. But one week into my stay I was biking twenty minutes all the way to school, and pretty soon after steering my two-wheeler in the middle of sandstorms and stealthily behind moving livestock. Or I think of smaller successes of initiating conversation in a room full of strangers (scary!) - as a recent graduate and new hire in the business world, I was faced with a lunchroom (well, more like fancy lunchroom) of mostly high level execs, and me the junior ranking marketing manager. It was worse than high school, but I stumbled my way through it.

At present I'm trying to feel more courageous about following through on my convictions. I feel so lame because convictions should be easy to act on - after all, they are convictions for a reason. But I often get so timid and can't muster the courage to push through, and end up waffling in a sea of indecision. Sigh.

"Therefore do not throw away your confidence, which has a great reward...But we are not of those who shrink back and are destroyed, but of those who have faith and preserve their souls." Hebrews 10:36, 39