Speaking from a Former Miss Congeniality

I used to have a coworker at my previous place of employment that I had sporadic contact with.  I would always approach each interaction with a bit of dread because he always appeared rather annoyed when I dealt with him.  Not used to such type of treatment, I made a secret pledge to get the guy to like me before leaving. 

On my last interaction with him I braved it up to tell him that I was leaving and that this most likely would be the last time I would have to interact with him.  Upon hearing the news he broke out in a smile.  Ha!  I had finally got the guy to smile.  'Leaving,' he said.  Surprised that I had finally broke him all I could manage was a 'yep.'  I had managed to get him to open up--it only took me telling him that I was leaving.   

I tell this story to illustrate how there is this drive in me to get everyone to like me.  It's a bit selfishly driven I've realized.  Being liked feeds my self-esteem, and thus I'm able to feel good about myself.  I see this same drive in operation as I'm here--and if I'm to survive out here I'm learning that I need to claim with absolute authority who I am in Him.

It's hard when the line of questioning around here looks like this:
- Where are you from (sounds more like 'what kind of person are you'?)
- How much money do you make?
- How much do you pay for rent?

Other questions include:
- Do you have a boyfriend?
- How many cars do you have in the States?
- How much do you make in the States?
- How much do your parents make in the States?

Then what follows is usually the person's assessment of what type of person you are.  You can literally see the wheels turning in their heads as they search to place you in some category.  When they look more closely at me they almost always say that I look more 'western.'  I credit my nose for that. Then they usually tell me what they originally thought I was--usually Korean, and sometimes Japanese.

For someone with a fragile ego such as myself, by some amount of grace I've been able to chuckle at these interactions.  I can almost predict with certainty the things they'll say.

Something I don't need to predict is what my Father thinks of me.  I am, without a doubt, His.